top of page
  • Writer's pictureNelly Thiessen

Is it Vanity?

I have recently been reflecting on vanity. This is something that I’ve thought about a lot; I also feel convicted about this in many areas of my life. Specifically, my husband and I recently talked about budgeting and saving wherever we could. We reviewed our carefully calculated excel sheet, and I expressed that I felt our budget for personal things like clothes was relatively low. My husband was a little taken back; he responded with something like, “don’t we have a ton of hand-me-downs in the crawl space?”. I instantly felt defensive and argued that some clothes weren’t quite “my style” for the kids and were also a little worn. And by that, I meant they weren’t what might be considered “trendy” now. You know what I’m talking about, that minimalist, neutral look everyone is going for these days.

This conversation hit me hard after reflecting for a few days. Have I become so caught up in vanity that I feel superior to second-hand clothes just because they might be a little brighter or graphic-y than what’s trending right now? To the point of feeling okay with cutting our budget in other ways and pressuring my husband to hustle harder to fund this trendy Instagram lifestyle I secretly admire?

Over the next few days, I came across scripture that again convicted me in this area of my life. It felt like each time I opened my bible; God showed me that I might have been led astray when it comes to where I’ve placed my outward appearance for myself and my family. How could that be so? The women actively sharing their trendy lifestyles on Instagram seem to be Godly women. Why did I happen to feel so convicted about wanting to be trendy?

I by no means feel it is wrong to dress presentable or trendy. This was just an area in my life in which I felt convicted. As a young family with a mortgage and a child in private school, why am I being so picky? We have a mortgage to pay off, and I’m concerned about my daughter wearing a perfect condition hand-me-down mickey mouse shirt instead of something neutral from The Gap?! The more I reflect on this, the sillier and more embarrassing it feels.

When I think of the most influential, Christ-like women I’ve met, my mind instantly goes to a woman from my old church and my mother-in-law. Both women are perfect examples of Proverbs 31 women, and they don’t dress themselves or their children elaborately (1 Peter 3:3). When I meet these types of women, my eyes don’t go to their elaborate styles or beautiful dresses. I am almost always greeted with a hug or an engaging and meaningful conversation about how I’m doing.

After a few convicting days of my lifestyle and reflecting on Christian women that I personally know (Not those Christian Instagram moms with beautiful flowy dresses and seven kids that all dress their kids to the 9s, you know who I’m talking about), I realized how important it is to go against the grain of culture. Against the world. What is it about these women that inspire me? Is it their outwardly aesthetic? For we know, we can’t possibly know someone through the lens of Instagram.

My final thoughts are, find a real-life mentor and beware of your influences. Find a Godly woman a few seasons ahead that can genuinely influence your heart because if you don’t, you might be reaching for wisdom from toxic places that distort what is truly important in a Godly household. (Titus 2:3) If you don’t have anyone in your life, pray and ask God to send someone your way. Having a real-life person you can go to for wisdom is not the same as following endless Instagram accounts of women you find influential.

132 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All

Naive and Pregnant

I didn’t realize how different I’d feel after being almost full term with my third baby vs my first. In so many ways, I wish I could turn back time and do this all over with the same mindset I had whe


Post: Blog2_Post
bottom of page